


I could be your perfect disaster, you could be my ever after

by Cypress_Dream



Category: Persona 5
Genre: #SoftGoroWeek2020, Akechi Goro Needs a Hug, Akechi Goro is Bad at Feelings, Anti-Hero, Awkward Conversations, Denial of Feelings, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Enemies to Lovers, Fairy Tale Elements, Hurt/Comfort, I Tried, I apologize in advance, I talk so much about that book its like im an english teacher, Kissing, Late Night Conversations, Light Angst, Literary References & Allusions, Literature, M/M, One Shot, Rated T for swearing, References to Canon, SoftGoroWeek2020, Songfic, The Count of Monte Cristo - Freeform, Why Did I Write This?, and it still ended up pretty sad, but lowkey, i really tried not to make this sad, on the cheek doe, please listen to Ever After by Marianas Trench
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-16
Updated: 2020-07-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:13:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25293745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cypress_Dream/pseuds/Cypress_Dream
Summary: Written for #SoftGoroWeek2020, day 4 'fairy tales and princes'.When Goro was younger, he used to believe his favorite book was a fairy tale. Its only when he got older that he realizes the truth.Featuring: awkwardness, wayyy too much information about The Count of Monte Cristo, and inevitability.
Relationships: Akechi Goro/Kurusu Akira, Akechi Goro/Persona 5 Protagonist
Comments: 5
Kudos: 46





	I could be your perfect disaster, you could be my ever after

**Author's Note:**

> -Title and inspiration from the song 'Ever After' by Marianas Trench  
> -I've never written for a week thing like this before, and I'm probably not going to write anymore fic for the week, but I figured I would give it a try. I wrote this entirely in one day, so please be kind.  
> -In terms of canon, this takes place near the deadline for Sae's palace.

Once upon a time, Goro thought he could be a hero.

When he was younger, Goro often had childhood fantasies of becoming a fairy tale prince, someone dashing and courageous enough to beat down all the evil in the world. He primarily got these ideas from the bedtime stories his mother would tell to him before they both turned in for the night. He would often beg and plead with his mother to read him fairytales every night, And she would oblige him, no matter how tired she looked or how late it was. She would regale him with tales of magic, sword fights and danger; of fairies and princesses that needed saving, and Goro was captivated by every single story she had told.

However, His favorite story out of all of them was The Count of Monte Cristo.

Granted, his mother told him a sanitized, kid-friendly version of the popular novel, but the story beats remained the same. The hero, Edmond Dantès, is falsely accused of a crime, and sent to an inescapable island prison. He’s stuck there for 14 years, so long that his rival who helped frame him ends up marrying his former fiancée, Mercédès Mondego. Dantès eventually escapes, and with another prisoner's help, he finds immense wealth in a treasure chest. He gives himself a new name and travels back to the mainland to get revenge on all the people who sent him to prison.

Goro was fascinated by the story. He would often ask for it to be read at least once every night. And when his mother eventually got too busy for him, he would start trying to read it by himself. The fact that Edmond never gave up on his quest, even after years and years in jail, inspired Goro. He would often mimic the epic sword fight his mother described that happened at the end of her version of the story during recess, conscripting other children to act as his rival who had framed him.

Even when he got older and lost any shred of innocence left, he still tried to model himself after that hero and the many masks he put on in order to deceive everyone in his quest for revenge. He would act gentlemanly, polite, and always composed, even while he was hiding a deep, intense desire for revenge. In every interaction, that mask of the perfect gentlemen was held in place.

Whenever Goro found himself doubting his plan, or whenever things got too much and he would end up curled into a ball in his empty apartment, he tried to think of Dantès. _What he went through was infinitely worse._ Goro would think, his arms desperately clutching at his sides. _ If Dantès could do it, then I can. Soon my plan will come to fruition, just like his. I merely need to be patient. _

But Goro knew, deep down, he wasn't a hero. Once he got his hands on the actual adult version of The Count Of Monte Cristo, he realized what he had been led to eblieve was false. A cherry-picked version, one without needless death and despair. When he was younger, he always pictured Dantès as a swashbuckling hero, similar to the princes in fairy tales. But The Count of Monte Cristo wasn't a fairy tale, and Dantès wasn't a prince like he’d always imagined. Despite the fact that his romanticized version of Dantès had been destroyed, the revelation that he was nothing like that person Goro imagined made him into a bigger role model, if anything.  _ He’s just as messed up as I am, _ Goro thought when he finished the novel for the first time.  _ I breathe disaster, just like Edmond Dantès.  _

He began to carry the book around him even after he had finished it, regardless. The first time, he had grabbed it with him to carry in his briefcase was by complete accident, but it soon became a habit. Whenever he would feel out of his depth, or unsteady, or simply unsure, he would reach a hand to the book and flick through the pages. _ If Dantès could do it, then so could I.  _ He would also re-read it when he had freetime, as well. Partially to avoid public confrontations with fans, but also partially because the words were familiar, nostalgic. Reading through the book when he was on public transit or whenever he had a quiet moment at work kept him present, centered. He probably had the first couple chapters completely memorized at this point.

He decided to start the book over again while he was sitting in LeBlanc, one afternoon. LeBlanc had become a bit of a habit of his, not only because it was away from the public eye, but also due to Akira working there. However, LeBlanc had become overall less calming than usual, as of late. Partly because of the deal he made with the Phantom Thieves to help them through Sae’s palace. Whenever he hung out in LeBlanc too long, he found himself becoming increasingly guilty about the whole ordeal. Therefor, Escaping into Dantès’ struggles while he was there was just another way to deal with the world around him.

_ Only a few more days, _ he told himself, flipping to chapter two as he finished the coffee in front of him. _ And then everything will be done and over with. _

“So, the Count of Monte Cristo, huh?”

Goro looked up suddenly, taken out of his thoughts. Akira was standing in front of him behind the counter, placing another mug of freshly brewed coffee in between them.

“Oh, I couldn't-”

“It's on the house.” Akira smirked. “Besides, I want you to stay longer so I know what you think of that book.”

Goro sputtered back a bit, taking the coffee and swiftly drinking it to give him time to respond. It _definitely_ burned his tongue, but after the whole Takoyaki incident Goro had gotten a bit better at keeping his mask on under duress. Akira was probably the only person who made his mask crack like that. And that fact alone scared him.

“Have you even read this book?” Goro eventually asked after bringing the coffee away from his lips.

“Oh sure, I skimmed it.” He shrugged. “I had to read it for an assignment.”

“Ah.” Goro gave a vapid smile. “It probably hit a bit close to home for you, I imagine.”

Akira gave him a questioning look, leaning both of his arms onto the counter. Goro found himself staring at them for just a beat too long. “What do you mean?”

Goro snapped his eyes away. “Well. A man wrongly convicted of a crime, sentenced unfairly by people in power. Sounds a bit similar, wouldn't you say?”

Akira stared at him for a moment before huffing out a laugh and shaking his head. “Huh. I should’ve known you’d dig up my record.” 

“I...well. I am a detective, I do thorough research.” Akechi blushed looked down, trying to convey regret. He had forgotten that Akira hadnt told him firsthand what had happened. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s cool.” Akira looked like he didn't believe him, but he pressed on. “I was just wondering why you keep that book on you. You always have it with you when you come here.”

“I... I didn't think you noticed.” Goro blushed even deeper. “If you must know, it’s partly sentimental.”

“Oh?” Akira tilted his head a bit sideways and Goro internally groaned.  _ He’s just not giving up, is he.  _ Goro shifted a bit on the barstool.

“It was one of my favorite novels when I was younger.”

“Isn't that book a little intense for kids?” Akira tilted his head.

Goro let out a smile, decided to throw him a bone. “My mother made it more out to be a fairy tale, when she read it to me.”

“Ah.” Akira nods, leaning back a bit.  _ I never told that to anyone before,  _ Goro thinks before promptly shutting that train of thought down.

“It has all the elements of a typical fairy tale, anyway. Dashing prince, damsel in distress, buried treasure chests.” He chuckles. “Could you really blame me?”

“I guess not.” Akira chuckled, and then suddenly turned somber. “Do you miss her, then?”

“Do I miss-” Goro looked up in shock, mask breaking for a moment. “What kind of a question is that? Of course I miss her.”

Akira just laughed more. “Sorry, sorry, the look on your face was priceless.” Akira leaned up against the back wall. “I just meant, you must miss her alot if you carry that book around everywhere you go.”

“I…” Goro stared at Akira for a moment. _How the hell did he notice?_ He asks himself again. Usually he doesn't whip out his copy that often, so that fact Akira noticed was fairly alarming. He clears his throat. “I told you. It’s mostly sentimentality, why I carry it with me.”

Akira nods, and it's quiet for a few moments, the only noise from the clock ticking on the far wall. Goro frantically tries to find the upper hand. “You never answered me before.”

“Hm?”

“I said, the novel must’ve hit close to home for you.” Goro painted a smug look on his face. “Did you end up liking it?”

“I thought it was fine.” Akira looked thoughtful. “It gave me some guts.”

“I….what?”

“Ah, nothing.” Akira waves a hand in the air and continues. “I just meant, seeing how tough the main guy was when he was in jail for so long, it was pretty inspiring.”

“Edmond Dantès.”

“What?”

Goro felt a stab of frustration. “The ‘main guy’? His name is Edmond Dantès.”

“Right, right.” Akira looked entirely too smug for Goro’s liking. “I thought the whole revenge thing was a bit stupid, though.”

Goro’s eyes widened. “Oh?”

“He could’ve done anything after he got that treasure. He could’ve started a new life somewhere far away. But instead, he goes out of his way to put himself in danger and go through this insane plan just so he can hurt these three dudes who screwed him over.” Akira shrugs. “Seems a bit overkill, to me. Not to mention reckless.”

_ Sometimes I think he disagrees with me just to be petty, _ Goro thinks, letting out a sigh. “But that’s not the point. The point of the novel is to hurt those people just as bad as he was hurt. Getting back at the people who hurt you is perfectly justifiable, even with the added risk.”

Despite the fact Goro was all fired up to have a heated discussion, Akira looked completely relaxed. “I guess we’ll just have to agree to disagree then.”

_As usual,_ Goro thinks, taking another sip of his coffee. There was a meaningful, pregnant pause, in which Goro finished the second mug Akira had given him. Goro stands up out of his seat, still facing the counter.  “There's just one thing I can't wrap my head around, Akira.” The other boy turns, confusion evident on his face. Goro continued. “You agree with me that you and Dantès are similar, right? But unlike him, you are not vengeful. Why?” Goro looks away suddenly, emotion bubbling to the surface. 

Akira had an unreadable expression on his face. He takes a breath to start speaking, and then suddenly abandons it. He slowly walks around the counter and faces Goro head on, placing his hand onto Goro’s shoulder suddenly.

“I’m...not entirely sure.” Akira speaks after an eternity. “A part of me knows that it is over and done with. I will, most likely, never encounter that guy who ruined my life ever again. But yeah, a part of me is pissed about it. It's why I awakened to my power in the first place, I knew what I did to save that woman wasn't a mistake. I would do it again, even though I know it royally screwed up my life.”

Goro raises his face to meet Akira’s face.  _ That's the most I’ve heard him speak.  _ He thinks dully.  _ His voice is nice.  _

“So I guess, I’m trying to say that it isn't all black and white. If the bastard who did it was right in front of me, I’d kick his ass no questions asked. But as it stands, I can’t do much about it. So I’m stuck." The other boy shrugged, a smirk dancing across his lips. "But I’m trying to let that shit go.”

Goro looked at his turbulent gray eyes. “You’re just like me then.”

“Huh?”

“Nothing.” Goro’s mind is racing.  _ He’s just like me. Me, him and Dantès. We all search for revenge in a world turned against us.  _

“Who do you want revenge on, Akechi?”

“No one.” Goro shakes his head and casts his gaze away. “I suppose...the people who didn't save my mother. But, as you said, I can't do much about that.” The lie tastes bitter in his mouth. _ I can never face the music when it's dire, after all... _ He thinks.

“Akechi-”

“We are even more alike than I previously thought, then.” Goro interrupts, not feeling up to Akira’s interrogation. He moves to start walking away, but Akira’s grip on his shoulder grows tighter and his other hand grabs at his arm.

“Akechi. You know that if you ever need help, I’ll be there, right?”

Goro stared at Akira’s hand on his arm and thinks. In this grand game, Akira must play the part as Goro’s  _ ‘Abbé Faria’,  _ his  ‘mad priest’ _. _ Someone who helps him along the way, someone who gives him valuable information, but who has to die in the process. Someone’s whose fate is tragic, but necessary. Goro already knows that the plan is in motion, and there's nothing he can do to stop it even if he wanted to.

But oh, how he wishes.

Instead of being the fellow prisoner _ ‘Faria’ _ , Goro wishes Akira was his  _ ‘Mercédès Mondego’ _ . A former lover, a damsel he is able to save from the clutches of his rival. When his mother told him the story, she always told Goro that Mercédès fell back in love with Dantès after he saved her, and that they lived happily ever after.

Here, within the quiet of the cafe, Goro takes one look at the boy in front of him and dully thinks;  _ you could be my ever after. _

But Goro knows this can't be true. In the actual novel, Mercédès and Dantès do not end up together, after all those years apart. And Goro knows he cannot be with Akira, no matter how much he wants to be. Dantès is not a hero, and neither is Goro. Mercédès is not a damsel, and neither is Akira. The world is not like the fairy tale that he once believed in. It's harsh, cruel, and spits on anything that diverges from the status quo.

So, instead of spilling everything right then and there and jeopardizing his entire mission, Akechi does the smart thing, and smiles numbly. “Of course I know that. The same goes for you, of course.”

Akira stares at him for a few beats. “Okay. I just wanted to be sure.” He lets Goro go, placing his arms limply at his sides. His expression was somehow more vulnerable than Goro had ever seen him look before. “I also want you to know that...well. I care about you."

“Oh, you surely can't mean that, I-”

Goro is cut off by Akira moving closer to him. Despite the fact he is moving slowly, the action causes the words to freeze up in Goro’s throat. Akira gets so close Goro can feel his breath on his face. Goro wants to run, but he finds himself frozen in place. He feels Akira place a single kiss on his cheek, and just as quickly as Goro registers that  _ yes, Akira did just kiss him _ , he’s walking away.

Goro stands there dumbly as Akira grabs a rag and starts wiping down the counter. "I do mean it, Goro." Akira looks up at him and smiles warmly. "Anyway. The trains are gonna stop soon.”

“R-Right.” Goro quickly grabs his suitcase, making sure to grab his copy of The Count of Monte Cristo. “I. Well. I should go.”

“Yeah.” Akira is still looking at him with a gooey look in his eyes. Akechi feels his face burn. _I’m probably red all over,_ Akechi thinks. _That bastard-!_

“I’ll see you tomorrow then?” His voice breaks midway.

“Yep.” 

Goro steps out into the bitter November air and takes a shuddering breath. He takes two steps, and then turns back to face the coffee shop.

_ If I wasn't such a coward...If we had met a few years earlier…  _ He sighs. _ You could’ve been my ever after, after all. _

He takes a breath, turns, and walks off into the dark of the night, heart heavy.

**Author's Note:**

> -okay this is bad but I'm gonna post it anyway  
> -I KNOW the prompt is very very loose and not what most people are expecting. And its not very Soft. But I needed to WRITE SOMETHING or my brain was going to rot from boredom. So take it.  
> -Only after I was midway through writing this I found out that The Count of Monte Cristo is actually very popular in Japan. So popular in fact, that there's a manga adaptation that was released in 2015. Who knew. Thanks Wikipedia!  
> -I haven't re-read the Count of Monte Cristo in many moons but I didn't want to go with 'Goro likes Robin Hood' bc it felt super cliche so I wanted to try something a bit different. I hope I didn't get any information incorrect.  
> -I also hope the lyrics I put in from 'Ever After' aren't too cringey. When I saw the prompt was fairy tales I re-listened to that song and I went "oh shit.....its him. Its Akechi. I'm gonna have to write this arent I."  
> -fun fact; my friend kat introduced me to Marianas trench, and I wanted to show this fic to her but she HATES Akechi, soooo. :/ I'm so sorry kat I love this bastard too much I have let you down.  
> -Thanks for reading! Drop a comment or a kudos if you enjoyed! (and check out my other P5 fics if you want okaythanksbye)


End file.
